Loosing security

Its Four days since I last wrote something, I feel alone and full of misunderstanding.

عظم آن دارم که امشب نيمه مست پای کوبان کوزه دردی به دست
سر به بازار قلندر برنهم پس به يک ساعت ببازم هر چه هست

I am scared of leaving everything; I can't know what will happen to me, anything could happen.

پرده پندار ميبايد دريد توبه تزوير مي بايد شکست

I feel like I have to put away all my belongings, all that I have cared for, all of which made me think I was important, no one can understand what I am saying. Some will say he is trying to look like Molana or whatever, others might say that he is mad, but no one is in my situation, no one can know. The last thing is that maybe I am completely wrong, that maybe I am misled by myself, that maybe this is another way of fooling my self, that maybe this is just a mental reaction to my situation. What ever it is, true or false, it sounds like loosing my security.