The Human Voice

”The gunfire around us makes it hard to hear, but the human voice is different from other sounds; it could be heard over noises that bury every thing else, even when it's not shouting, even when it's just a whisper. Even the lowest whisper could be heard over armies, when it's telling the truth."

The above phrase is from the film, The Interpreter. It was written on the beginning of a book written by an African leader. He had saved his country from blood shed when he was young and taken it in to liberty, making a hero or rather a fantasy of himself in the minds of his people; but as the film tells he has turned in to a dictator after many years, and is rather now hated by his people. Unbelievable as it is, he has come to a point where for the sake of keeping power he would, pay little black African boys their lunch money so as to make them kill people as he or his companions wished. There are some questions to ask; first and last as it is the most important, is how come such a heroic leader who could write and believe in the above phrase, makes such tragedies? This question is valid although the story might not even be true. Maybe the answer would be that we have not yet come to know the human being. I must admit that the film has really no answer for this question, and it tries more or less to show how human friendly and protective and loving Americans are;
For how long are we going to carry on with this way of living? Why are we still living like our ancestors, still killing and being killed? Why haven't we changed after all the improvements we've had over the ages. The man, who carved stone, would kill and just the same would the man holding a cell phone next to his ear. Instead of gradually putting the swords away we have come to make machine guns and grenades; we have made weapons of mass destruction that kill thousands of people in less than a second. Why didn't our ways of living improve?
We are all responsible, each and every one of us. War and killing is the result of separation; it is because, there exists something called my country and also there is another called yours; it is because there is some one called me and some one called you; and defense is the result of such beings. Me is my home, my family, my town, my friends, my enemies, my country, my beliefs; and mine is separated from yours and I care only for mine; my care is not because they should be cared for, it's because their mine. Do not take this wrong; one should defend family and life no matter what so ever but not because they're his belongings, rather for the reason that, that action would be the right thing to do. The right thing to do needs no reason for being done it should just be done.

The Ending of Ramadan

I am sorry but I can't tell you. You pobably wouldn't understand. You know Maybe you would undrstand but I don't think your mature enough; you would probably laugh at me and then there would be no point in telling you. so its best for both of us to forget about it. Oh come on don't take it personal. You know, of the 3 or 4 (I counted my self) readers I have one or two (again I counted my self) would laugh at it and it would then be ruined.

I woke up feeling a great sensation. I saw the head lines on Shargh news paper while coming to university and it was about waiting for Eid to come. On reading that I was about to cry, It's so sad that such a great month is going to leave us. Part of my last nights dream was just about that. I dreamt that it was the 30th day of Ramadan, and I had some food in my mouth and some one told me to spit it out because it was not yet known whether Eid had come or not, and I did as I was told and while washing my mouth to get rid of the small bits of food that linger in one's mouth I was tempted to drink water. After waking up I thought the great sensation or feeling I had was about that dream, but then I remembered another part of my dream which made me sure that my feelings of sensation were because of that. That is what Iam not going to tell you; the other part of my dream.

Recently I have seen a good film, three times in three days: Danny The Dog (2005) played by Jet Li. Not an action film, but a drama which is realy well screened and it's worth seeing. Morgan Freeman plays a blind person. It is a good film. Though it has some scenes of great violence, one can be mature enough to see the other more emotional part of the film and you could even cry on some scenes; from that point of view it can be compared to The Passion of the Christ or Brave Heart. Another thing that I like about the film is that it has English acsent and it makes me remember my childhood.

تجربه ی بروفن

یکشنبه شب سردرد خیلی بدی داشتم . احساس می کردم که زندگی بدتر نمی تواند باشد؛ یک قرص ایبوپروفن از هم اتاقی ام سعید گرفتم و حدود بیست دقیقه بعد از خوابگاه خارج شدم تا به خانه ی خاله ام بروم. سر خیلبان که رسیدم دیگر سردردم تمام شده بود. این قدر از این قضیه خوشحال و سرمست شدم که خودم را مهمان یک نوشیدنی ناب کردم و بعد در کمال خوشی به راه افتادم. از این لحظات تا آخر آن شب در حسی از وجود قرار داشتم که آن را تجربه ی بروفن نامیده ام. در لابلای خاطرات آن شب تجربه ی بروفن را نیز توضیح خواهم داد. به طرف اتوبان حرکت می کردم در حالی که از ناباوری با خودم حرف می زدم و می خندیدم. تا به یک مکانیکی رسیدم که یک چشمش کور بود و از او آدرس پرسیدم. برای رسیدن به مقصدم سه راه مختلف را به من پیشنهاد کرد که من از شدت سرخوشی فقط تا سر اولین پیچ آدرس را می فهمیدم. از سر شانس و اقبال شاید به تاکسی برخوردم که به جای مستقیمی که من خواسته بودم مرا تا سر خیابانی که مطلوب من بود برد (همین مسیر را با سه تاکسی هم رفته ام)و در طول مسیر مهمانم کرد به هفت هشت بیت از مولانا و حکایتی از ابوسعید ابوالخیر و من چنان سرخوش بودم که جاودانگی و سعادت از درونم می جوشید و من بی خبر بودم. مضمون ابیاتی که می خواند یکی از سخنرانی هایی بود که از کریشنامورتی هم خوانده بودم: چه قدر لازم است که بر هر لحظه بمبریم؛ بر سال های طولانی که از پی هم گذشته است، پر لحظه ای پیش و بر همین لحظه که اکنون در جریان است. بدون مردن پی در پی تولد و نو شدن پی در پی چگونه ممکن است؟ حال کمی بیشتر از تجربه ی بروفن بگویم. در آن حالت هیچ ناراحتی ای یا غمی یا تضادی وجود ندارد تو از هیچ چیز ناراحت نیستی و حتی نمی دانی که چگونه در این دنیای پر از عشق و صفا ناراحتی می تواند وجود پیدا کند. در این حالت در بند هیچ چیز نیستی هیچ چیز حتی تجربه ای که در حال کسبش هستی. تو را هیچ اراده ای نیست که از آن حالت بیرون بیایی، بهشتی است توصیف ناپذیر. هر لحظه در حال خوشی و سرمستی هستی و تمام وجودت را پر از زندگی است. من چه سبزم امروز و چه اندازه تنم هوشیار است؛ این حالت را مصرف کنندگان مواد مخدر لااقل در اوایل مصرفشان و برخی عرفا در طول عمرشان تجربه می کنند.

هرچند این حالت برایم به غایت زیبا و خواستنی است اما هرگز نمی توانم آن را از روی عمد و قصد ایجاد کنم؛ به هیچ وجه پیشنهاد نمی کنم که به قصد تجربه ی حالتی مشابه ایبوپروفن مصرف کنید و مسئولیتش را هم به هیچ وجه بر عهده نمی گیرم؛ تا به حال هم از دیگرانی که این قرص را مصرف کرده اند چنین حالتی را نشنیده ام. بهتر است به حال و احوال طبیعی خودمان احترام بگذاریم به این معنا که او را بشناسیم و از کوچکتریتن حرکاتش آگاه شویم. نارضایتی در تجربه ی بروفن هیچ جایی ندارد.