Christ and his passions!

I need to write what goes on in my mind. Any way lets get on with the usual things.
Last night I watched for the second time The Passions of Christ. I started watching from the part when the Jews take Christ to the Romans and want him crucified. I watched it to the end. Many points as it comes to me of are to be noted. The first thing is whether Christ was crucified at all? This question I can not answer certainly but to keep going we have to make the assumption that he was. My second point lies in a scene where Christ has been whipped on his back and has fallen and the whipping has stopped, at this point, Christ sees his mother and after some glances are exchanged, He stands up on his feet, which makes the Romans beat him more and more. Why does Christ do this? Is this the punishment one man takes so that his nation doesn't? What kind of god lets this? To me these are of less importance, the more important question is how come Christ can take all this punishment and not give in? What kept him from giving in? And for this question I have one answer, which is very hard for me to bring to words, but I will try. There are actions that when we carry out, we have no doubt about its truth. Absolutely no doubt was in his mind about giving in, there was no place for thought in his mind, of whether to give in or be hurt more and more. He was conscious of the fact that what was happening had to happen, so he never even thought of giving in, of course he was hurt, and he bled, but this was what had to happen, this was what god had wanted. I do not believe that Christ was crucified but I used this example to explain a kind of action in which there is no place for doubt, for doubt comes from seeking the mind, from thinking, from comparing one thing with another. When one sees what is right and what is wrong, then there is no place for thought and if this seeing can take place then there will be no wrong doing.